“I don’t care how a guy looks at
me or treats me as I have lost my virginity already.” I was forced to look at
her face after hearing this sentence and to my disbelief she looked not more
than 20 year old. The more shocking about it was her story that how she was
sexually harassed rather raped when she was 10. She was raped by her cousin who
was in his teens back then, and it was not once. She was threatened to not tell
it to anybody in the family. The cousin did it several times and she kept quiet
as she knew nobody would believe her.
But then, one day, when she
finally gathered courage to refuse him; she was beaten up by him severely. She
decided to tell it to her mother, finally. At first, the mother accused her of
making up stories but then when she saw the wounds on her body; she believed
her. Even the mother was of no help to her. To save the girl from more disgrace
in the family, she asked her to stay quiet. Mother only got more skeptical and
took no serious action other than restricting her limited liberty. The girl
grew up in a more conservative and over protective environment. All this only
resulted in shaking up the girl’s personality from inside out.
Now, this was the story of a
young girl who moved to a big city from a small village for her education. The
bitter experiences of her childhood are affecting her independence badly. She
talks to all the random guys she can, dates them and tells them every personal
detail they want to know. And the worst part is that she is getting into it
despite knowing the consequences.
Parents, after hearing such
incidences, should never accuse kids of making up stories. Never trust anybody
when it comes to your kids. Anybody and everybody can get down to this level
and sexually abuse your child. Parents’ reaction after these incidences leaves
an impact on children. Punish the abuser and not the victim. Restrict the
mobility of that person abusing your child and not your own child. Ban the
entry of such person without thinking about the consequences. Nothing and
nobody can be more important than your child’s personality. Give your child
full confidence and secure him/her.
What happened to this girl is
nothing new. There are many girls around who get sexually harassed on the daily
basis. But the way she, or the girls who face the similar situation, is reacting
is worse than what has happened to her already. You have to accept it that what
happened to you was not your fault. You just can’t give up and present yourself
as a sex tool for men now. What happened to you in the past wasn’t your mistake
but what you are doing today with your life is entirely a fault of yours. And
most of all, what you are doing now is against all your moral, religious and
social values. Don’t punish yourself for somebody else’ crimes.
It is hard to move on; but giving
up is not a solution. Now that you are getting an opportunity to prove
yourself; you need to do it. You just need to prove that you are a woman more
capable of doing everything you want. You are more than an entity who can just
be used just for one purpose. Look beyond your fears and identify your talents.
Don’t ruin yourself over bad memories. Being cynical and giving up won’t give
you anything. Just try forgetting the past and come up stronger. If you
couldn’t help yourself in your childhood; grow up to be a strong woman capable
of helping your future daughter. It’s hard moving on; but that’s the better
choice. Don’t consider it the end of your life; take it as a new beginning.
SIMILAR POST WAS PUBLISHED AT THE CAUSE BLOG
